Hey – wouldn’t it be really cool if there was some ridiculous picture of a guy with his pants falling down, plumber style, while stuck to theunderneath of a car? Or something crazy like that? Wish I had one of those pics! A REAL reason to study hard, my friends:)
All of my life, and I do mean ALL of my life I wanted to get married to the “man of my dreams” and have kids with him. (On a personal note, I did that, but some kinks were thrown in that little ideal first and WHOA! there goes another thrown kink!) For most of my life, up until the age of 16 1/2, I wanted to also be a pediatrician. I was young – maybe 5, when I started doctoring baby dolls wounds. I used to create scenarios in my head of their issues, illnesses and injuries and then treat them accordingly. Some times, I was very successful, other times, not so much. My imaginary husband was named Bill. He passed away several years ago after a horrible argument. Note: I am still here and he is NOT. Anyway, I was a world renowned pediatrician (with occasional spelling issues), several dogs, a wonderful husband and at times, 26 children. As I got older, the amount of children Bill and I had decreased significantly, and the issues I faced at my imaginary pediatric ER increased in technicality. As I got a little older, I started to work with real kids with real issues. I was a tutor in fourth grade for several dyslexic children. I visited a school for hearing impaired children. I did work studies, under the actual guidance of my pediatrician – a man I admire to this day. Then, at 16 1/2, roughly when you begin to make college choices, my dad filled me in on some secrets he had been told. For example, the divorce rate (at the time) was 3x the national average of other jobs – equal only to the divorce rate of airline pilots. THis was significant to me as two of my friends were going through divorces in their own homes – dads were Delta pilots. Then, it REALLY hit home when I went to intern one day at my pediatrician’s office and found out HE was getting divorced. That was it for me! No more desire to be a pediatrician! I didn’t want to get divorced from the man of my dreams!!!! (Seriously, a totally true story.)
But back to the original point: I made it to 16 1/2 wanting to be a pediatrician because I was assured there was very little geometry involved. I asked. Many people. Often. I always hated math. I mean, HATED math. My mind doesn’t work best in “absolutes.” Why is the answer “54”? “56” seems like a great number and it is so close to “54.” (BTW, my husband and children should be thanking God right now that my mind doesn’t work best in absolutes. Just a little side note.) Algebra sucked, but eventually sank in and to be honest, when people said “you will need this later in life,” I saw how that might be possible. When my geometry teacher said, “you will need this later in life,” I went on a mission to make sure I wouldn’t. (This mission applied to three subjects in my life: geometry, trigonometry, and physics. Again, I don’t work in absolutes.) I hated geometry soooo much, I began asking EVERYONE, including guidance counselors, hair stylists, mechanics, pediatricians, EVERYONE with a job if they had to use geometry on a regular basis and for what. Turns out, you don’t need to compute the area of a yard you are sodding in order to be a pediatrician. You call a lawn service. That made me so happy! (It didn’t hurt that it also didn’t matter what E=, cause in a pediatricians world, all you need to know it the kid hit the corner of the table with his head REALLY hard and is now bleeding profusely. I don’t need to compute the engery, time or speed at which he hit the table! Was exhilarating for me!)
Anyway, the divorce rate shut me down on being a pediatrician. I went with things more my style. Psychology. (Insert smart ass comment here, anyone who knows me. But, at least there are very few absolutes.) Now, I still had to study geometry, trigo frickin nometry and rat ass physics, but I did study. A lot. And, really hard. HATED it, but I did it because I didn’t want a big fat “F.” Actually, I couldn’t even accept a big fat “C,” so I really studied hard. (We are getting to my point here…) And, thank God I did. No, I don’t use geometry in my daily life. The last time I sodded my yard, I called the company and said “I need sod.” He said “How much?” I said “I have no clue.” He said to measure and call him back. I measured, he delivered the amount I needed. I did not one bit of area computation 🙂 But I got a big ol’ kick in the head when my 11 year old showed up with less than good grades in geometry. Now, I have to help her.
I must say, I nearly vomitted, called my math wizard father and said “Help!” To be honest, I did call my math wizard father, read him a description of what she was supposed to understand, and then say to him – literally – “What the fuck???? I don’t even know what this means!!!!! How the hell am I supposed to help her???” When he stopped laughing, he said, “I don’t know, but you are going to have to find a way.” I took a deep breath, pulled my boots up (figuratively), and online researched geometry until I realized I was actually starting to remember, maybe even understand some aspects of it. NOw, the really good news, I mean really, really good news is the 11 year old had the concepts down, she just wasn’t organizing her computations well and had a bit of a struggle with following written directions. Phew. She worked very hard, and is now doing well. I am grateful for what i learned. 1. I can do 5th grade geometry 🙂 2. If I hadn’t studied as ridiculously hard as I did when I was in 5th grade, and again in college, I would not have been able to help the child do her homework. 3. I need to find my personal journal soon, otherwise, I am going to be a rambling blog mess. 4. I still hate geometry. 5. Kids connect with you when you tell the truth – geometry was hard for me, and I told her that. 6. You truly never know the value of something you learn in the moment you learn it. 7. Always, always work hard. What you are doing or studying at this moment might not seem important, but I am truly, truly grateful I tried when I was 11 and again in college to understand something I hated – it brought me closer to my 11 year old. I was able to shoe her the mistakes I used to make, I was able to help her be better/do better than I did. Isn’t that the point of life???